Explain it to me like I'm a two-year-old.

Dec
2nd

Wed

GPOYW braving the crowd and posing dorkily in front of a Christmas Tree.

Here is a better shot of said tree.

47 notes

Comments (View)

I LOL’d. Then I pee’d.

This reminds me of the HIMYM episode where the girl called Ted snooty for pointing out typos in the menu and laughing at them. See, my English is not so premium* but typos tickle me. :-)

*I love you if you know this reference. <3

18 notes

Comments (View)

It's all fun and games until Mark Zuckerberg writes you a letter.

piscesinpurple:

Then it’s all, Guess my right name or I’ll claim your firstborn child!

I wish Zuckerberg wrote me a closed letter. If you know what I mean.

11 notes

Comments (View)

Hehehehehehehehehe.

I might (might) have said ZOMGZ DAT IZ DA BEST TWEET EVER!!!11!! U R TEH R0XX0RS TIM!!! TOTALY AWSUM!!!!!11!!!!!1

(I know it’s rude to share DMs without permission but SQUEE!)

10 notes

Comments (View)

Favourited, retweeted, Facebook-status-updated and now screenshot-ed.

What a perfect tweet.

21 notes

Comments (View)

Dec
1st

Tue

I got the books before the MacBook. Hehehe. It’s like What To Expect When You’re Expecting Someone To Buy You A MacBook Pro For The Christmas You Don’t Celebrate.

26 notes

Comments (View)

Baby, I can see your halo. You know you’re my saving grace. <3

21 notes

Comments (View)

I can has vaksinashunz?

So our company is arranging (and bearing the costs) for a healthcare provider to administer the H1N1 vaccination onsite at our office. Should I go for it?

The best things in life are free?

14 notes

Comments (View)

Nov
29th

Sun

Let me tell you something, kid. Working sucks, okay? Working sucks! And it doesn’t matter if you’re in a bank, a department store or a donut factory, because once you’ve been there long enough, the only thing you’ll care about is when your next pay increase is, how many vacation days you’ve accrued and if your health insurance is gonna pay for the cholesterol medicine that keeps your heart pumping no matter how much shit you’ve worked through it. Then after you’ve gained 20 or 30 pounds because you’re so fucking uptight all the time, you wake and discover you’re working for your father-in-law in a position with a gratuitous title and you’re totally replaceable. And not only is the new guy better at your job, but he’s got a better car and better jokes and better hair! So no matter what you do, you make sure you make a lot of money doing it because it all sucks! And that is one lesson I, as your mentor, can teach you.

— Bill.

6 notes

Comments (View)

Nov
26th

Thu

Happy Thanksgiving, Americans.

This is the first year I’ve actually cared about Thanksgiving and it’s fun watching you guys celebrate (and bitch about) it. Hope you all have great food. Because just like thankfulness, you can’t have it all year round.

I expect lavish wishes for Eid tomorrow.

25 notes

Comments (View)