May 2009
151 posts
May 30th
20 notes
I don't get people who don't like eggs.
May 30th
May 30th
May 30th
7 notes
The children are watching My Little Pony in...
May 29th
6 notes
Mojo sometimes asks how many Likes his photo gets. Okay, no. I tell him how few hearts he gets then I tell him to buck the cute up. My Tumblarity isn’t going to help itself, teddy bears.
May 29th
May 29th
15 notes
My Top Five Chicken Soups.
5. For the soulmate. 4. For the soul asylum. 3. For the psychedelic soul. 2. For the Seoul in mourning of their deceased ex-leader. 1. For the one with no soul. One above and one below.
May 28th
9 notes
May 28th
25 notes
May 28th
23 notes
Love?
When magic happened And We We had our moment And you told Me How beautiful How brilliant How smart How funny I was If only I I had listened To those words With care Because You You were talking About you.
May 28th
9 notes
May 27th
7 notes
Ugh.
My sister - Scrubs the whole kitchen damn clean. Me - Makes burgers and fries for everyone. Guess who her kids love more? Their stupid uncle (my other sister’s husband).
May 27th
May 27th
He finally replied with "Of course, no problem!"...
May 27th
10 notes
May 27th
15 notes
I texted my boss last night about taking today...
May 27th
I miss alsobacon.com. Especially on Wednesdays.
May 27th
6 notes
May 27th
19 notes
May 26th
Don't wowwy. I will be with you!
May 26th
May 26th
Okay. Sorry. I'd just really wanted to say I love...
May 25th
7 notes
May 25th
14 notes
It's so uncertain in love.
May 25th
5 notes
May 25th
4 notes
May 25th
8 notes
May 25th
5 notes
My Top 5 Pretzels
Original Sour Cream & Onion Almond The One The Clerk Didn’t Hear Me Order Pudding.
May 24th
I bought pretzels instead.
May 24th
1 note
May 24th
5 notes
May 24th
16 notes
Have a Happy Period!
The maxi pad post reminded me of my favourite McSweeney’s entry: AN OPEN LETTER TO MR. JAMES THATCHER, BRAND MANAGER, PROCTER & GAMBLE. Last month, while in the throes of cramping so painful I wanted to reach inside my body and yank out my uterus, I opened an Always maxi pad, and there, printed on the adhesive backing, were these words: “Have a Happy Period.” Are you...
May 24th
8 notes
Some people think I'm a biased bigot. It's not...
May 24th
6 notes
May 24th
15 notes
May 23rd
May 23rd
May 23rd
May 23rd
16 notes
May 22nd
6 notes
Whatever, you people with the sushi. I'm having...
May 22nd
9 notes
I'm awake! I forget. Am I a zombie or are we in...
May 22nd
6 notes
May 22nd
9 notes
Why I love my mother. "Lisa! There's a blue whale...
Now I’m sorry for spending $20.
May 22nd
I asked my mum for $10. She had no change so she...
May 22nd
13 notes
May 21st
15 notes
May 21st
Haha.
Me: Lol. This is hilarious. There's a cockroach running around on the train.
yhf: IT'S ON VACATION FROM NY
May 21st
8 notes
Letter to my teenage self.
Hey there, Don’t cry when people make fun of you. Ten years from now, you’ll be popular for making fun of yourself! Love, Future L.
May 21st
You make me pee like a natural woman.
Actual thought whilst in the toilet a minute ago. I HOPE YOUR NOT BLAD(DER).
May 21st
15 notes